Is anyone else getting Miranda July’s “The Future” emails? It’s part of the marketing campaign for her new movie and you can also hit her site for “The Oracle” or to sign up for “The Future” emails. As someone who spent way too much time avoiding writing my college papers by clicking on the Sun-Angel oracle and checking up on my numerology advice, I was totally sucked in as soon as I heard about it.
Miranda’s emails come on Mondays and Thursdays and totally random and off-kilter. Some of favorites have been “It will be important and it will be RED. Don’t assume it will involve blood. Cherries, tongues and bricks are also contenders,” “Good job with how you handled everything last night. This proves, once and for all, you are the right person to be you,” and “A woman named Sarah. That’s all I know. Hopefully you know if you should flee her, save her, love her, or if she is you.”
The week that I accidentally poured coffee into my laptop and my two-and-a-half year-old Droid OG phone decided to give up, I got this: “Something goes very wrong today, and THAT’S OK. Listen carefully: it’s important that this thing NOT WORK OUT.” Yes, it’s completely vague and impersonal like newspaper horoscopes (five-planet Scorpio right here), but there was something comforting in that message showing up out of the blue.
However, I feel like today’s message is good for everybody:
“You are insulting yourself in ways I find insulting. Insult a hat like that and I promise the hat will cry. Today you stop.”
Yes. Remember that. Don’t make the hat cry and be nice to yourself.